An anonymous Inspiration

I was browsing through my old blog and I saw this random comment on my "Angels and Demons" post where I placed down pictures of the altars and markers so that It would be easier to visualize the sculptures and churches in the book. The comment says:

This really got me, well, happy in the most unexplainable sense. I don't know and I'm not entirely sure but when I read the phrase "it was worth writing about and not just for your personal enjoyment" it hit me right through and through. It feels awesomely good to know that the things you do or the things you write about actually help people. I know for sure that maybe you think I'm the most shallow person in the world but this gave me an overwhelming sense of accomplishment and joy. To have someone appreciate your work or just give you that simple 'thank you' is strongly good enough to suffice for all the hardwork.

It's so sad though that I was only able to read this now because as you can see from the post above, it was dated a year ago and even if I reply to the person, He/she wouldn't be notified. So, I am making this post for the person, whoever he or she may be. I am utterly and genuinely overjoyed to have helped you!

I really wish one day that I can help and/or change people's lives through writing or through my blog. I hope that someday, I can be a person full of.....no, not knowledge, but wisdom. I am really waiting for that moment when I can devote my life to helping people or that time when I can release and let go of all my personal interests and live for others

The happiness that gives you tingles running down your spine, that's what everything is all about! That's what we should all aim for. Though I know it's merely impossible...I mean, even for me but (I know I'd sound like some hero from a book ) Happiness should triumph against all odds.

Snippets of Pangil, Laguna

It's fun to discover rarely visited places hidden in the middle of nowhere...well, not exactly 'nowhere' let's just say 'in the middle of the mountains'. Pangil, Laguna is a town somewhere near Paeta and Mabitac. We went there to take a look at the river and just took some pictures and left after two hours for Caliraya (What a spontaneous trip). If you'd ask me what my favorite body of water is, I'd say Rivers. If truth be told, I have a little fear of the Sea and my wild imagination of sea creatures doesn't help at all. Rivers, on the other hand are far more relaxing, I guess. The free flowing sound of the water as it hits the rocks are music to my ears and not to mention the feeling of having your feet soaked in cold water. Stress relieving indeed! :) I demand a river near my house! :))

Tita baby, Tita Beng, Tito Bong and ate Pearly

I wanted my picture taken with the same background. Holding the camera and being the one to take pictures most of the time has its downs. 

My cousins and I went in this same river 10 years ago and we call it "ahhh! yung ilog kung saan nalunod si Clariz!" Yup, my cousin almost drowned here because she wanted to swim so bad with my older cousins who were in the deepest part of the river. My brother saved her. Twas a funny memory actually. We all just laugh at it whenever we recall the memory.

My mom super wanted me to have a picture taken with the Carabao behind me. 

I am immensely gaining tremendous amount of weight to the point of visibility. NOT.GOOD.

Holy Week 2012

Me and my family spent the Holy Week in my mom's farm in Mabitac, Laguna. It's a 4 hour drive from Manila but we left home a little bit late so we got stuck in traffic for 6 hours. We went to 8 different churches and it was crowded everywhere. My mom even planned to go to Kamay ni Jesus but we didn't push through because we anticipated the amount of people rushing in the area and with the summer heat...i didnt even think that's a good idea. Probably, next time. 

I seriously don't even remember the last time I went out for Visita Iglesia. I spent most of my Holy Week at home which doesn't really bother me (or maybe I just got used to it). So, it was actually a great thing that I came with my relatives to Laguna and witness the different ways of how people celebrate this Holy Week. Truly, it is only through lived experiences that you appreciate other people's way of living. One that I was able to see was the "penitensya" which involves cutting the flesh on one's back and walking under the heat of the sun, half naked with a mask, while holding a rope with metals at the end and slashing your back with it. This wasn't actually the first time that I saw this. 8 years ago, I celebrated my Holy week in Laguna as well and it was way worse before. There was really blood everywhere and no, it did not scare me. I was 11 years old then and believe me...those religious practices actually amused me (gah, I was probably a sadist in my previous life :p). Most people would say that they just do it during Holy Week so that God will forgive them for their sins. However, after a while, they go back to their usual routine - whatever it is (raping women, adultery, theft, slander, etc). That fact kind of makes me angry to be honest and it's also saddening that people take God's love for granted. I do not know who to blame. I mean, you can't just get infuriated at people for stealing because you'll never get to know the reason behind their story (like, his mother is probably on the verge of dying and he needs money for surgery, medicines, hospital bills and the like). Oh well, the world is filled with envy, pride, greed and domination. It is basically up to you on how to change yourself and live for the better - y'know, be wiser, be more knowledgeable, more people-loving and kind hearted. 

Anyway, Holy week is about reflection and moving on. It's about being thankful for having a God - no matter how much others think that there is no such thing. People say the only thing that is constant is change but I would also like to add that in my life, GOD, is probably the most constant thing. I know that whatever will happen to me I will continue on Believing. I may not be able to honor the sabbath day every Sunday but I BELIEVE and I WILL LIVE His words and I guess out of everything else, that is the most important. 

3pm Thoughts

If you take the path the heart does not fully desire, where could it possibly lead you? It's a dangerous risk to take, don't you think? 

I have been BLOGGING and BRAGGING about how wondeful the nursing course is and IT JUST REALLY IS. But (yes, there goes the BIG BUT), the load of work and the ROI do not complement. Don't get me wrong here, Im not a materialistic person and i don't really give a damn care about one's social status or the amount of money you have in your pockets. It's just that - one way or another you'd be needing money that's enough to fend for the needs of your family and the future family (shoot, I know I sound like a 30 year old - but i'm graduating a year from now so I have the right, stfu). Nursing can't give you that in a span of 10 years ( overseas work aside), unless, of course, you tie the strings with someone rich or you win the lotto and whatnot. I like nursing and I have fallen in love with the course because it reflects the kind of person that I want to be. Being rewarded by people's mere 'thank yous' towards the work you do is good enough to make up for that sleepless nights trying to finish your case studies and care plans. I entered this course half hearted and along the way I must say that this course have made me a better person - a person who learned to love other people, even the complete strangers, as much as I love my own. I managed to see the beauty of SERVICE despite all the traumas and breakdowns it can give you. However, going back to the real topic (sorry, my thoughts are always all over the place), the thank yous and feelings will just give you a moment of completeness within you that's open for recall but... it can never sustain you. At the end of the day, you'll still need the money to live. And it's giving me this frsutration and disappointment that I have to rely on it to survive and to live the kind of life I have been dreaming of. I want to be a nurse with the extraneous variables out of the question but that's not gonna happen unless I live in a utopic world.  I am still having second thoughts not with the course but with the work i'm going to have after college and as i regret to say this - I'm still half hearted. I don't exactly know what lies ahead and I hate to say this but  I am afraid of the uncertainties and even the possibilities of this career. Right now I'm just doing the job that I'm supposed to do as a student though I have been really so tamad and grumpy towards the workload the past semester but I am trying to exert much effort in my studies. HAHA! amp! I'm on vacation for the love of the Lord!

It's not healthy for my brain to be without a stressor for a long period of time because thoughts like this rise to surface and I'm not comfortable with it.

I caught fire

 Top

 Bottom

Top and bottom :))

First ever Fashion Illustration using Water color. I'm so glad I bought my water colors in tubes yesterday instead of the usual placed on palettes. Hopefully, I don't get tired of doing this so that I can hone my skills and achieve something far greater than this sketch. I also need to practice on the croquis and shading - I suck.

Wabi Sabi

After the Orientation for our completion duties for summer, I went to Muji in Greenbelt 3 to buy A4 blank sheets of paper so that I could start practicing on my sketches this summer. I've been such a bum lately and it's tiring. Tiring because I'm not doing anything and that's the worst type of being tired.*sigh* I'd really like to spend this summer in a more productive manner. Hopefully (now that I have some of the materials I need), I get the driving force to pick up my pens and start doodling/sketching/painting.

I ABSOLUTELY love Muji. I fell in love with it right at the moment when I went inside the first branch in High Street. Everything is just uniquely simple but elegant looking. I'm a huge fan of Japan's "wabi-sabi"-  that is ″wisdom in natural simplicity.″ Also,  what I like most about this store is their pure concern for environmental issues. When I was browsing through the Muji website, I read this :

PACKAGING

When packaging products, MUJI seeks not to adorn them but rather to highlight their natural colours and shapes. For this reason, we use bulk packaging and place products in plain, uniform containers. Faithful to our philosophy of simplicity, this approach is also in keeping with our policy of conserving resources and reducing waste. Thus, all Muji products appear on store shelves in simple packaging bearing only product-related information and a price tag.

 Although some of the items they sell are quite overpriced (in my opinion) especially the set of colored pens and pencil which I am dying to lay my hands on, I guess, it's all worth it given that they try to save the environment. :) 

After Muji, I went inside Powerbooks to buy a ring binder for my papers. While looking for an apple green binder, my eyes suddenly saw this beauty...

 Honestly, I have never seen a designed binder my entire life. This one was the first...so I bought it. It's so pretty and it costs only 96.50 pesos. Hopefully they will add more designs in the future.

I also bought a set of water colors. 

 

Have I ever mentioned that one of my dreams is to go on a shopping spree in National bookstore? haha, wala lang :)

No I'm not Lucky, I'm Blessed

'Twas indeed one busy Saturday! The morning event took place in a certain University where my mother was a guest speaker for their graduation/pinning ceremonies. My mother rarely talk about nursing on a one on one basis with me. I mean you guys would probably think that as the daughter of a nursing director, My mom would be very strict with me when in comes to my studies but, really, it's the complete opposite. She always tells me that I am a totally different person - I am not her. She also added that even if people may seem to have high expectations, I've just got to do what I got to do. I do not have to live up to people's expectations. And I'm happy to have a mom like my mom :) It's actually even funny because one time when she saw me studying, she shouted "Itigil mo na nga yang pag-aaral mo! nakakasira ng social life yan. okay na tres." :)) My mother never really believed in the numbers on the report card. Primarily because she never got any awards nor recognition back in college but look where she is now. This is also the reason why I never based my ability as a student nurse on my grades. 

Anyway, moving on...I learned a lot from my mom's speech because it was way different than any of those cheesy speeches where you always here the word compassion, calling, etc. etc. It was more on her experiences and practices. I'd actually like for my friends to hear it as well. Also, in the same event the cum laude of the school gave his speech and it was truly inspiring and motivating at the same time. From him I got this quote by Martin Luther King Jr. 

“If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.”

I agree. No matter how much people look down on you because YOU'RE JUST THIS AND YOU PROBABLY JUST EARN THIS CERTAIN AMOUNT OF MONEY, you should still work hard and be the best that you can be.

After the morning event, we had to rush to PICC for the graduation of MMC-CN Batch 2012. My mom was invited to give the award for best in clinical efficiency for 3rd year (which happens to be me) and 4th year students.It was a 4 hour graduation. Congratulations, Batch 2012!

With mother before entering the Hall